truth hurts
by krystalxo
Summary: one boy tries to win back his best friends trust but he ends up confessing he loves her but she wont take him back and theres a talent show.


Back when I was thirteen I fell for my best guy friend. He was incredible. There came a point where I thought he felt the same way but I never confronted him, I was so scared too. As months past on I only fell for him harder. I liked him for months. Then I realized I loved him because a year had gone by and my feelings for him were so deep and real. I never told him but I think about how things might be different now if I had. You see he and I are no longer best friends because well stuff happens. Okay I lied the truth is I honestly don't know what happened between us. I was so upset and mad because 1) I just lost the only boy I ever loved and 2) I didn't even know what I did to make him leave. It took me about two and half years to fully come together. He didn't break my heart; he just made it ache a little bit.

Now I'm sixteen and it's a new year and I've never been better. One downside though is that he's back in my life but we don't acknowledge each other. Things are completely different now. He's not the same guy I knew three years ago but I guess people change because I know I'm not the same girl I used to be either. I, however, have changed for the better, in my opinion but he's changed for the worst.

You see I've always had this dream to be a singer but I have stage fright. I never auditioned for anything because I was afraid but I've always loved singing. Music also plays a big role in my life. Well one day in March I decided to face my fear. I signed up for the school's talent show. I auditioned and got in. I was going to be performing I Turn to You by Christina Aguilera. I absolutely loved that song.

In early April he tried making peace with me but I shut him down.

**Him**: "Hey, can I talk to you?"

**Me**: "No, you've had 3 years to talk."

**Him**: "I'm sorry."

**Me**: "That's all you got? Goodbye."

Word had gotten to me that he was falling for me and hard. People expected my heart to go right back to him but it didn't. There was no one I was ever letting him back into heart or life for that matter. He and I are done. It may not be what I would have wanted in the beginning but it's what just needs to be done. He tried talking to me again in mid- April.

**Him**: "You deserve a million apologies."

**Me**: "And somehow I doubt even one of them are going to make up for all the tears."

With that I just walked away without giving him a chance to speak. I didn't feel bad for being so terrible to him, but in a way he deserved it.

By the end of April I was rehearsing for the talent show everyday for a week. I had to overcome my stage fright. The talent show was in the first week of May, May 7th. School was going great for me, I'm a junior. I'm an A student and always have been. At the end of one of my rehearsals I couldn't help think about what he said to me a few weeks back, "you deserve a million apologies." Ah, I shook my head getting his words out of my mind.

It's May 7th, the night of the talent show. My stomach was in knots all day and I had nervous butterflies. There were about 100 and some people in the audience. About twenty of my friends were there as well as my relatives. Promptly at 7pm the talent show started. I was the sixth performer of the evening. On my way to my spot of the stage I spotted him. I couldn't believe he was there because he's not one for school events but I couldn't run away, I had to do this. I got in my spot and the music started playing and I was off: "….I just reach for you and I could reach the sky again…." I finished up the song and people cheered. I had never been happier. I conquered my biggest fear. After me there were four more performers. Afterwards while everyone was leaving we, the performers, had to stick around. I found my parents and told them that could go home and that I'd drive myself home because I had my car. After everything was cleared up we were allowed to leave. Therefore I left.

On my way to my car I noticed him sitting on a nearby bench. He had a bouquet of white roses. Oh how I loved white roses. I never told him or anyone else that. When we were friends one of the things I loved about him, he knew me better than I knew myself. Maybe just maybe he still knew me. I noticed him first so before I kept walking I paused and rolled my eyes. Then I continued to walk, he saw me and got up. He came up to me and said, "Hey, these are for you. You were amazing."

- I take the bouquet from his hands -

**Me**: "Uhm thanks."

**Him**: "…You're welcome."

- Awkward moment of silence -

**Him**: "You still mad at me?"

- I take his hand and sit on the bench -

**Me**: -sighs- "Look, I'm not mad at you anymore…I used to be but things are different now. I was also just upset and hurt. You didn't even try staying in touch with me after we grew apart. You didn't even make an effort so I didn't either."

**Him**: "Do you hate me?"

**Me**: "Ryan, I never hated you, I could never hate you."

**Ryan**: "But you won't let me back in your life, again."

**Me**: "Yes, because I can't trust you anymore, I want to but I just can't."

**Ryan**: "I want you to be able to trust me again, what can I do to make you trust me, again?"

**Me**: "You can't make me trust you, you have to _earn_ it. And I'm sorry but there's nothing you can do to earn it again. I could forgive you but I'd never forget what I went through because of you."

**Ryan**: "So there's nothing?"

**Me**: "Nope, I'm sorry."

* I noticed a tear fall from his eye and it fell from his left eye*

* thinking to myself * I knew for a fact that if a tear falls from the left eye, it's from pain and if it falls from your right eye, it's from happiness. It was at that very moment that I realized I hurt him like he hurt me only my hurt was worse than his. Out the corner of my eye I see him look up.

**Ryan**: "I love you."

**Me**: "I loved you."

**Ryan**: "Past tense?"

**Me**: "Yeah."

**Ryan**:" I thought if I said it you'd…"  
- I cut him off -

**Me**: "I'd what? Say it back and things would be okay? And we'd give us a try?

**Ryan**: "Well yeah."

**Me**: "Well I am truly sorry but that's not going to happen, any of it."

**Ryan**: "Why not, Kay?"

**Me**: "Because love doesn't always work. It doesn't always cut it for me, anymore. Ever since we grew apart, you made me hate love. Love doesn't truly hurt but I hate the idea of love now."

**Ryan**: "But, Kay, then I didn't even know that you loved me."

* Tears form in my eyes now *

**Me**: "Would it have even made a difference then, Ry? We were nothing more than best friends. How was I supposed to tell you I was falling for you? That would have ruined everything. But I would have told you if I had known our friendship was going to end when it did."

**Ryan**: "So this is now suddenly my fault?"

**Me**: "No, that's not what I'm saying. It's not any one of our faults. Things just happen."

**Ryan**: "Then be with me, here and now! Let's put the past behind us."

**Me**: "You think it's that easy? It's not and I wont, I'm sorry."

**Ryan**: "But I love you. I've never said that to any of my previous girlfriends."  
**  
Me**: "I'm flattered but I don't love you. Goodbye, Ry."

With that I turned and decided to walk home. I had too much on my mind and was in no condition to drive. As I walked away I wiped the tears from my eyes. I have to admit a part of me wanted to forgive him but I couldn't let myself go down that road again. I was proud of myself that night.

The End


End file.
